


Santa Clarita: Drink Me

by duointherain



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-20
Updated: 2019-02-20
Packaged: 2019-11-01 06:05:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17861741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/duointherain/pseuds/duointherain
Summary: The boys temporarily transform into other forms. It's a silly story :)





	Santa Clarita: Drink Me

Santa Clarita: Drink Me  
by duointherain

disclaimer: I don’t own Gundam Wing. 

Notes: This is a silly drabble. Santa Clarita was a series I did so long ago... the boys when to foster homes, then they all kinda ended up at the ranch in Wyoming... It’s high tech and silly. This scene as been on my mind for a long time :) 

 

At the Ranch:

Martha scowled. Open a group home for war orphans Alan said... it’d be fun he said. But you can’t do any experiments on them! God forbid that one of them come up dead. 

Martha tapped her fingers on her desk, then turned on the video intercom to Joel’s study. “Did you take equipment from my laboratory?”

Joel, a pretty blond man with green eyes and a smile that could win hearts and destroy marriages looked up at her and shook his head. “I have a broken leg, my liver is still regrowing, and I have probably another ten hours till I beat this game. I didn’t take your damn equipment.” 

“Well, that leaves only one suspect,” she hissed. “That boy is going to be the death of me if I don’t kill him first!”

Joel sighed. “You love the little shit more than anyone else.”

“Go get my equipment!”

Joel paused the game, leaned back in the big comfy chair. “Yeah Right after my liver finishes regrowing, ya harpie. Oh.. I know, you could get Alan to do it, if you were okay explaining to our angel what kind of equipment you keep down there. Want me to call him over for you?”

“Keep it up, you’ll need to regrow your tongue,” she hissed. 

“Just chill. The boy will bring it back.” 

“He’s a menace!”

“He’s so much like you, are you sure he’s not biological?” 

Martha growled and cut the connection.

<><><>

“So! Who wants to go first?” Duo asked, all grin and no common sense whatsoever.

The other four and Zechs stared at him and the pencil sharpener sized piece of equipment. “Explain it to me again,” Zechs said. 

Duo sighed, huge and exaggerated. “So. You set this here dial to the dna sequence you want, could be anything. Then you activate it and it makes a pill. You take the pill and for the next six hours, give or take, you take on the genetic expression you dialed.” 

“Is it painful,” Quatre asked, leaning over to look at it. 

“Nope. It’s just like magic.”

“No such thing,” Heero said, deadpan. 

“Okay! Who is the bravest?”

Wufei’s jaw tightened, but he’d been around Duo long enough to know how that was going. 

“Me.” Zechs said. “I guess I’m the oldest, and I’m kind of interested. So what can we turn into? Like a lion?”

“Yeah. That’d be short. Sheriff Watson’ll shoot your royal ass dead. Let me pick for you, okay?”

“Okay,” Zechs agreed. 

Duo grinned, such a special grin. Wufei took a step back, but didn’t say anything. Duo’s victims were Duo’s responsibility. A moment later, a small little pill popped out and Duo handed it to Zechs. “Just put it under your tongue, like homeopathic medicine?”

“Yea,” Duo said, a hint of L2 patois seeping in. 

Wufei covered his face. They were in it now. They just were. 

A moment later, all the boys were like staring at Zechs. Wufei pointed a shaking finger at Duo, accusingly. 

Duo rolled his eyes and signed back in their own inner group sign code that he’d never do that to Wufei, never. 

“I don’t feel any different. You guys look like something changed.”

Duo’s grin went full psychotic. “Do you feel smarter?”

Hands on his hips, Zechs cocked his head, “Yeah, maybe a little... everything just feels a little faster!” 

Heero swallowed, which was because his mouth was dry. “Take a selfie.” 

“Okay,” Zechs said, but then he heard his own voice and started rushing for his phone. “Noin! You turned me into Noin?”

“Relena explained about periods to me. They sound pretty rough. You know they’re controlled through genetics? Everything is. You might want to find the girls room.” 

Zechs/Noin glared at Duo. With expressive hand gestures, he sighed, “I suddenly find myself being much more empathetic! I think I’ll just follow you around and menstruate all over you!” 

Duo’s mouth dropped open. 

“Ha!” Trowa said. “I bet you didn’t see that coming.”

“Nope, not even a little. Point to Zechs.” 

“I’m next,” Trowa said. 

In a couple minutes, Trowa was a Great Dane. Quatre became a lovely Persian kitty who promptly jumped up on Trowa’s back. Wufei became an owl. 

Heero took his pill, but glared at Duo before taking it. “You’re not riding me.”

Duo rolled his eyes. “Wouldn’t think of it.” Heero became a German Shepard. 

Duo became a raccoon, who totally had been planning on riding Heero, but almost the moment he transformed the most delicious and enticing aroma drew him. It took all his raccoon thought power to remember to stow the device like he’d planned. “Do you smell that,” he yelled in raccoon. 

Wufei, screaming in owl, was perfectly understandable to all of them, and still came with a know-it-all accent. “What you’re smelling is the trash!” 

“Oh delicious!” 

Zechs, who had never put his phone away, was more than happy to video their exploits. 

The highlight, as far as he was concerned, was Quatre begging Duo not to eat the pizza he found in the dumpster and Duo swearing it was the best thing ever. Of course, he liked a lot less when Martha turned his phone to stray atoms later that night. 

Their adventures didn’t last six hours. They last until Martha found them, retrieved her device and made them walk five miles home because she wasn’t letting them in the car. Zechs complained that she wasn’t a feminist if she shamed periods. 

She said she was never a feminist and he should have known better than to be playing with children and stolen technology. 

She marched them all in the house, checked them over to make sure they were healthy and back to normal, gave Duo something to calm his stomach because she didn’t want to pump, and send them all to bed. Duo was the only not hungry. 

<><>

Duo and Heero shared a bedroom and most often the same twin sized bed. Snuggled up next to each other, blankets over their head, they called Noin.

“Did you do it?”

“We did!” Duo said gleefully, then transferred her all the footage from the drone Martha hadn’t destroyed. 

“You’re the best!” 

Sadly, Duo got no kisses that night, not even after brushing his teeth twice.


End file.
